I'm really into asian looking animals
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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