So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize