I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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