I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
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