maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
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