so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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