We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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