Texts From Last Night

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  (917): View more from New York City

  I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina

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  (917): I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina http://tfl.nu/sexo
  Replies (71) Good night (6591) Bad night (762) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?

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  (443): hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"? http://tfl.nu/cmo1
  Replies (23) Good night (1209) Bad night (5366)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone

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  (513): i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone http://tfl.nu/hza4
  Replies (15) Good night (5232) Bad night (993) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it

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  (917): Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it http://tfl.nu/sdds
  Replies (14) Good night (5589) Bad night (860) Order T-Shirt
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.

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  (774): I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books. http://tfl.nu/zd3b
  Replies (14) Good night (3866) Bad night (722) Order T-Shirt
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today

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  (708): hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today http://tfl.nu/usqr
  Replies (10) Good night (1730) Bad night (1073) Order T-Shirt
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"

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  (603): You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet" http://tfl.nu/9891
  Replies (2) Good night (3491) Bad night (534) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much

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  (516): I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much http://tfl.nu/71lk
  Replies (1) Good night (1118) Bad night (499) Order T-Shirt
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister

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  (615): I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister http://tfl.nu/e4ue
  Replies (6) Good night (1331) Bad night (553) Order T-Shirt
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.

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  (770): You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point. http://tfl.nu/sxoa
  Replies (8) Good night (330) Bad night (886) Order T-Shirt
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  (787): View more from Puerto Rico

  I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.

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  (787): I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth. http://tfl.nu/to4d
  Replies (5) Good night (786) Bad night (961) Order T-Shirt
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?

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  (313): I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night? http://tfl.nu/g93i
  Replies (7) Good night (1507) Bad night (471) Order T-Shirt
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.

  (1-440): View more from Ohio

  That's better than I've done so far.

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  (440): Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today. (1-440): That's better than I've done so far. http://tfl.nu/4hrm
  Replies (0) Good night (998) Bad night (385)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.

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  (910): No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess. http://tfl.nu/luxa
  Replies (6) Good night (1575) Bad night (447) Order T-Shirt
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......

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  (586): Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet...... http://tfl.nu/yh71
  Replies (3) Good night (195) Bad night (484) Order T-Shirt

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