so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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