Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
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