I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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