yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
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