Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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