i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?