Texts From Last Night

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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  So drunk i had to piss sitting down...

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  (803): So drunk i had to piss sitting down... http://tfl.nu/050t
  Replies (7) Good night (1000) Bad night (446)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?

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  (803): Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything? http://tfl.nu/hmy2
  Replies (7) Good night (865) Bad night (4446)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.

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  (917): He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing. http://tfl.nu/j7tr
  Replies (11) Good night (5741) Bad night (750)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.

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  (206): Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me. http://tfl.nu/s5ld
  Replies (8) Good night (3265) Bad night (1042)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up

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  (773): once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up http://tfl.nu/esy3
  Replies (5) Good night (2616) Bad night (588)
• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring

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  (661): It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring http://tfl.nu/4h9t
  Replies (8) Good night (1628) Bad night (795)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset

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  (412): I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset http://tfl.nu/cmm6
  Replies (8) Good night (759) Bad night (2122)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.

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  (336): Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army. http://tfl.nu/tv7a
  Replies (11) Good night (892) Bad night (794)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  We need more drag queens in our life I've decided

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  (781): We need more drag queens in our life I've decided http://tfl.nu/77cl
  Replies (3) Good night (1051) Bad night (510)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.

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  (773): Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass. http://tfl.nu/m2gp
  Replies (6) Good night (1312) Bad night (499)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?

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  (515): Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo? http://tfl.nu/dsc3
  Replies (13) Good night (1378) Bad night (337)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  eyebrows regrow, your balls dont

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  (215): if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise. (609): eyebrows regrow, your balls dont http://tfl.nu/311u
  Replies (6) Good night (1003) Bad night (321)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.

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  (907): Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again. http://tfl.nu/nki8
  Replies (5) Good night (608) Bad night (203)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.

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  (520): At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget. http://tfl.nu/wj00
  Replies (6) Good night (237) Bad night (432)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?

  (1-519): View more from Ontario

  Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?

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  (519): Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!? (1-519): Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic? http://tfl.nu/6rsm
  Replies (1) Good night (556) Bad night (213)

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