I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.