so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize
