She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
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