Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
