you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
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