white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize