Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
