I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Randomize
