Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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