I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
just come out here and I will go home with you...
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Randomize
