Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me

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  (248): im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me http://tfl.nu/nrzq
  Replies (10) Good night (1192) Bad night (517)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work

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  (214): I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work http://tfl.nu/fhj1
  Replies (47) Good night (727) Bad night (3404)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  Me and my dog bond so much when im high.

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  (407): Me and my dog bond so much when im high. http://tfl.nu/9nf2
  Replies (66) Good night (7404) Bad night (832)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.

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  (503): I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't. http://tfl.nu/gt6v
  Replies (6) Good night (4045) Bad night (1256)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?

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  (541): I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad? http://tfl.nu/iz9x
  Replies (11) Good night (3811) Bad night (1584)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.

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  (814): Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now. http://tfl.nu/xg11
  Replies (16) Good night (6827) Bad night (2240)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.

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  (412): Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator. http://tfl.nu/e8nd
  Replies (6) Good night (1772) Bad night (543)
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.

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  (931): Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult. http://tfl.nu/v17w
  Replies (10) Good night (1314) Bad night (502)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.

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  (615): I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow. http://tfl.nu/1nuc
  Replies (7) Good night (1065) Bad night (672)
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  (807): View more from Ontario

  My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.

  (1-807): View more from Ontario

  I don't see the problem

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  (807): My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive. (1-807): I don't see the problem http://tfl.nu/s96d
  Replies (5) Good night (1583) Bad night (521)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.

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  (270): it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring. http://tfl.nu/qdw6
  Replies (7) Good night (538) Bad night (1292)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go

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  (902): Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go http://tfl.nu/ajer
  Replies (7) Good night (1050) Bad night (358)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME

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  (541): next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME http://tfl.nu/v34b
  Replies (3) Good night (1077) Bad night (419)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.

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  (+61): He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar. http://tfl.nu/olys
  Replies (3) Good night (358) Bad night (560)
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  (315): View more from New York

  Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!

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  (315): Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night! http://tfl.nu/mal7
  Replies (0) Good night (350) Bad night (199)

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