I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize