I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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