jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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