Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
So drunk its hurt
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
