bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
