You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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