"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
