Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Randomize
