her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
