At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize