all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
