I hate your face
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
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