Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
please don't ironically join a cult
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