Buhtt sex?
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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