What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
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