Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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