I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize