got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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