you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
