One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
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