Sponge bath it is.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
His hands were made for my vagina.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize