ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
