Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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