Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Come share oat with me in your robe
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
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