Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
