Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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