btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
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