do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
